‘Britain’s Got Talent’ Auditions – Week 3



As Britain’s Got Talent return for its third week of auditions shows, we’re back with our weekly recap.

Highlights from this evening’s twenty one performances include 50-year-old dinner lady and cleaner , 11-year-old , international circus performer and 22-year-old bricklayer .

Here’s the full run-down on tonight’s auditionees, and the judges comments:



Steven is a 52-year-old part-time artist from Kent.

: “It was uncanny how unlike all those people you were.”

: “I’ve got to be honest with you Steven. Your wigs are like animals. They’re the worst wigs.”

Steven [To Simon]: “You can talk.”



Linda is a 50-year-old dinner lady and cleaner from Essex.

: “We’re going to go to a vote. Linda. Linda. Linda. Linda. Linda. LINDA!!!”

: “Well for fighting spirit you win. [To Simon] That’s your new catchphrase… LINDA.”

: “What was her name again?”



, which translates as Mattress Circus, are a group of circus performers from London.

: “I hate clowns.”

: “We hate judges.”



Asanda is an 11-year-old school girl from London.

: “I cannot believe my eyes. You know, when you are on the money your voice is incredible. I can hear you on a record already and you’re 11 years old. You were like a little diamond. I’m lost for words.”

: “I mean I kept laughing because it’s just ridiculous. And you’ve got all the moves and the little glances.”

: “Asanda, you know I’ve never seen anyone who’s got such amazing stage presence for an 11 year old. I mean seriously, seriously good.  And you have the best smile I have ever seen.”

: “It was phenomenal. I’m going to say yes.”



Marcus (32) and Lisa (24) are a married couple from Stoke, and they have a dog called Johnny Cash.

: “I think you’ve got this completely wrong. Maybe at a push a holiday camp.”

Marcus: “I disagree with that Simon, definitely.”

: “Most people do when they’re told no.”

: “That was so terrible.”



Bill is a 53-year-old Scottish line dancing instructor from Warwick.

: “It’s four no’s but thank you.”



are a band from London.

: “Well, you’re a ready-made band. You’re fresh. I love the blend and the chemistry between you. You are solid, the beat boxing is wicked. Your voice is beautiful.”

: “Lumities, it was amazing. It feels unique and the harmonies, perfect. It was absolutely a brilliant, brilliant audition.”

: “What is there not to like about you. Fantastic song, you’re all brilliant musicians. You’re all very easy on the eye as well, in your own ways. No you’re fantastic, I didn’t mean you so much actually. You’re like ready-made stars.”

: “The song choice was absolutely genius, genius. Your vocals were outstanding. It’s very cool. By far the best audition we’ve heard today.”



Shirley (53) is a carer, and her son James is a student – they’re both from Birmingham.

: “Shall we just put them straight through or do you want to do the comments?”

: “No, no, we’ve got to go through a process.”

: “That was beautiful and thank you for sharing it with us today.”

: “It’s your face. It’s like Madge from Dame Edna. It never moved.”

: “It truthfully bought tears to my eyes but for all the wrong reasons. Let me kick this off with a no.”

: “What? I thought you were close to your mother, but I think you can’t be, because I think anyone who’s close to their mother would realise the beauty of what we just saw.”

: “Well my mum’s my best friend but I’m still saying no.”

: “I sort of want to see more of it somehow, because it was so bizarre.”



Heather is a 39-year-old sign language teacher from Leicester.

:”Heather if I could give you some constructive advice, I would lose the singing from the act.”

: “You were just bonkers.”

: “I thought it was genius. Well I’m going to give it a high kicking yes.”



Ray is a 62-year-old support worker from Huddersfield.

: “I love your organ. I love it. I could see you doing a kind of greatest hits of opera… On the final of Britain’s Got Talent.”

: “Back to planet earth. Alesha?”

: “It’s a no.”

: “I tell you what David, would you like to manage Ray?”

: “Yes I would like to manage Ray. Because I would like to end up considerably richer than you.”



are a group of musicians from Leeds.

: “It was very moving. Simon you were smiling throughout and tapping your feet and clapping along.”

: “I wasn’t. Look, it started off sort of ok because I like that piece of music. But then you hit bum notes and then it ended with this ghastly trumpet solo.”

: “I would like to say that I’ve been a little bit premature and I like to withdraw my buzzer. It was very entertaining, it was funny. You had everybody on their feet at the end.”

: “I mean I wasn’t supposed to like you, and I didn’t want to like it at the beginning actually but by the end I kind of love you.”

: “You’ve gone absolutely, completely..”

: “What’s your problem? Do you not know talent when you see it?”



Jack is an unemployed 27-year-old from Carlisle.

: “It was pointless. If you had more interesting objects then I would have liked it more. Couldn’t you have done animals or something? Like a horse?”

: “I’m sorry Jack it’s a no. He could definitely balance things on this chin.”

: “Who cares? It’s not a dangerous act.”



is an international circus performer from Bristol.

: “I thought you were going to swallow it. I think it would have made the act more interesting.”

: “I wanted more danger and more risk.”



Jaz is a 40-year-old performer from Paris.

: “You are good at what you do, and you are entertaining.”

: “I thought it was clever but I do believe that with an act like this there has to be an element of danger and I don’t think a spoon falling on your head is dangerous enough.”

: “I think maybe a spade or something, or a toaster?”

: “A microwave?”



Aaron is a 44-year-old ‘mentalist’ from Belgium.

Producer: “He’s not speaking because his act is very dangerous and he has to be in a certain mental zone beforehand.”

: “That’s a great act. I love the idea of watching something where there is a possibility that someone actually could actually die, and the fact that it was Ant made it more exciting, I’ve got to be honest with you.”

: “I’ve never seen anything like it in my life. We were all on the edge of our seats because we thought this man just could be a nutter.”

: “Yeah, that’s why I liked it. I find you really intriguing. Just the way you commanded the stage and your presence alone was exciting.  It was dangerous, I was like oh this is great and you were just fantastic. Loved it.”

: “My heart was like pumping through my ribcage. The suspense and the intrigue and the mystery it was absolutely terrifyingly brilliant.”

: “Can I ask you a question? If you were to make it to the next stage would you be willing to put David on stage, in that situation, with something slightly smaller than a pineapple?”

: “He needs to be in a movie. He looks wicked.



Luke is a 20-year-old student from Sheffield.

: “I’m not going to remember that in 10 minutes time, that’s the problem.”



Mellissa is a 16-year-old student from Shropshire.

: “This is the sort of thing I would expect to hear outside a subway station.”

“I’ve literally banned anyone else turning up with a guitar. I can’t listen to anymore. It’s too depressing.”

Simon O’Driscoll



Simon is an 18-year-old student from Ireland.



Bethan is an 18-year-old from Scotland who works part-time in McDonalds.

: “If I hear another ‘I’ve been dumped’ song today I’m literally going to throw myself off a bridge.”



Richard is a 24-year-old musician and student from Devon.

: “You don’t have a girlfriend that’s dumped you and you’re going to sing a song about it do you? Phew.”

Richard: “No, it’s about a girl who went travelling.”

: “And she didn’t come back?”

: “So it is a song about a girl who dumped you?”

: “You said you’d just off a bridge if another person came on and sung.”

: “I think we’ve got lots of singing guitar players, singing depressing songs.”



Robbie is a 22-year-old bricklayer from South Wales. Simon stopped him mid-way through his audition and requests he sing another song.

: “Robbie, you are so likeable. My heart is pounding. You just knocked me out. You have been blessed with a true gift.”

: “Robbie your voice is outstanding. You’re 22, where have you been? Do you sing when you work?”

Robbie: “Not proper singing. Just along with the radio just to my dad.”

: “So do any of your work mates know how talented you are? Well I can’t wait. You are absolutely going to knock them dead when this goes out on the telly. You were brilliant.”

: “The contrast between your amazing voice and the acoustic guitar playing worked fantastically. It was really, really stunning and it blew us all away, so well done.”

: “I’ve got to be honest with you, I wasn’t expecting that. Do you know what Robbie, I think that if you put that record out you would have a number one hit with that song. Loved it.”

“You know what Robbie, the charming thing about you is that you don’t know how good you are. Congratulations. Four yeses.”

: “What a find!”

: “When he walked out with the guitar I was out. And then he started singing.”

Watch a trailer for the series below.


Jordan is the Editor-in-Chief at imediamonkey®. He set up the website in August 2009 and has been at the helm ever since. Jordan is also one of the two Company Directors at imediamonkey® ltd - the parent company of imediamonkey®.

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